Boys, girls or what?
Dec. 16th, 2011 10:23 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
datahawkI’m thinking over a conversation a friend and I are having in Twitter about underwear, panties specifically. The comment was made to me that at least I’m the ‘correct’ gender for my obsessive collection of panties. I realized I don’t subscribe to that notion. Girls can wear boys clothes with little question made of them, however a boy wears girls clothes of any fashion and it’s ‘weird’ or different. I have so many friends who are gender correcting or gender fluid that I have a hard time considering there being a correct gender for panties.
Then it got me thinking of kids and specifically tomboys. I am a tomboy. I never ‘grew out of it’ like so many girls are expected to. So, do tomboys grow out of it because they want to or because society, and possibly their parents, are forcing them to. My personal opinion? I think it’s the expected gender roles defined by our society that expect girls to grow out of being tomboys, that call non masculine boys sissies and adults fags and dykes for not dressing, or acting, how we are expected to.
I am a girl. It is something I have never questioned. I am a girl who society thinks dresses like a boy, because I wear comfortable jeans and casual t-shirts and I’m more likely to be in my Vibrams or Converse than heels. I am also a tomboy who wears frilly panties and lacy bras. So, then what do you call me? I call me, me.
Then it got me thinking of kids and specifically tomboys. I am a tomboy. I never ‘grew out of it’ like so many girls are expected to. So, do tomboys grow out of it because they want to or because society, and possibly their parents, are forcing them to. My personal opinion? I think it’s the expected gender roles defined by our society that expect girls to grow out of being tomboys, that call non masculine boys sissies and adults fags and dykes for not dressing, or acting, how we are expected to.
I am a girl. It is something I have never questioned. I am a girl who society thinks dresses like a boy, because I wear comfortable jeans and casual t-shirts and I’m more likely to be in my Vibrams or Converse than heels. I am also a tomboy who wears frilly panties and lacy bras. So, then what do you call me? I call me, me.
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no subject
Date: 2011-12-16 06:31 pm (UTC)Part of the problem for me is that I grew up with clearly defined gender roles and was given a clearly defined gender identity. Looking back, it's part of what caused me problems as a teenager. It's taken years for me to break down the barriers that I had built up around my gender identity.
I have a much different view of gender now, but I still live in a world where most people don't. And even though I am surrounded by friends that accept me for who I am, I still feel the pressure around me to conform to the traditional gender role/identity, even when I don't like it.
So while I do my best to accept myself for how I am, it's sometimes hard to feel like I'm allowed to do so.